Well, after weeks if not months of rumors brewing, a few days ago(apologies for the tardiness), Goldenvoice announced the official lineup(subject to plenty of choice as always, of course) for the 2008 Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival. While I certainly will be neither first nor last to declare this year an absolute wash, I declare all the same.
Let's break it down day by day:


Friday: Headliner: Jack Johnson - give me a fucking break. How this is even possible boggles my mind. I realize it's the first night, maybe not as many folks are around, but all the same, last year Bjork headlined the first night, and killed it(or at least so I heard from the street outside cause we didn't get there in time. Damn that traffic!). But seriously? Jack Johnson? I'd sort of thought he was dead, or least his career was. What music of his is so compelling at this point that it warrants a headlining spot at the biggest music festival in the country? You've got me.
Then of course there's the rest of the bunch: The Verve (uh, okay...), The Raconteurs(really?), The Breeders(admittedly rad), Madness(absolutely rad) and a host of others. Highlights include The National, Animal Collective, Battles, Aesop Rock, Spank Rock, Diplo, Vampire Weekend, Dan Deacon, Cut Copy, Datarock, Professor Murder, and Rogue Wave.


Saturday: Here is the big one, the day worth going for. Portishead, Kraftwerk, and Death Cab for Cutie. Say no more. That's almost worth the price of admission right there. Throw in MIA, Rilo Kiley, Hot Chip, Stephen Malkmus, St Vincent, New Young Pony Club, and 120 Days and you might have a pretty solid day on your hands. But of course there's more to consider.


Sunday: Brace yourself for the headliner of the century...
It's Roger Waters performing Dark Side of the Moon. Oh my god! This would be amazing! If it were 1975 and I had a garbage bag full of dirt weed. I mean, give me a break. But wait. What's that you say? Justice is playing again? Chromeo? The Streets? Metric? A bunch of other jokers? What a jackpot! Sure, Love and Rockets and My Morning Jacket are playing too, and that could be cool. Just not that cool

Suffice it to say, I'm pretty disappointed. Considering last year was an all consuming powerhouse of musical wonderment and at least a few other big, largely nonsensical words. Rage, Air, Arcade Fire, Bjork, now those are some headliners. But this...This is just a mess. it's not that there aren't some great bands playing, there absolutely are. However, those bands will all be touring on their own all over the country this summer. Portishead has a new album dropping, their first in 11 years, and you'd be foolish to think they won't hit the road for at least a couple of US shows to support it. Kraftwerk, that's a toss-up. Who knows when they'll resurface again, but I guess it's a chance I'll have to take. And what the hell happened to Radiohead? Seriously. But at least they'll be touring as well, and there's no way they bypass Los Angeles so I'm keeping hope generally alive.
But as for this years Fest, I think I may have to sit it out. Even with the VIP treatment, I'm not sure this lineup is worth 3 days in the blistering sun packed in with 130,000 jerks screaming for Dwight Yoakam. So I guess that's all folks. Just remember, when you're about to drop that 300 bucks on tickets think to yourself: Who the hell is Jack Johnson anyway? The Verve was almost as bad as The Verve Pipe. And Roger Waters is not, under any circumstances, Pink Floyd. And no amount of dirt weed is going to change that.

Have fun.